Helicopter Parenting


Sheila Chaney, UPAT Parent Educator

What does it mean to be a helicopter parent? A helicopter parent is someone feels the need to hover over their child/children.  When we are trying to help our children achieve something, sometimes feel the need to help too much.  In our excitement to see our children progress we may take over.  (I know parents that do their children’s chores, art, and homework.) Our children need the opportunity to see what works and what doesn’t work. We don’t want to suffocate or hold back our children. They need opportunity to learn and still be supported regardless of results to the projects. This is so important in the growth of a child.

Helicopter moms can instill fear in their children without even realizing it. Fear to not do it up to your standards. Fear of never being able to do it like mom. Fears of not doing it right the first time.  Often we see our actions as helping when it can be just the opposite.

Children want to please their parents. Learning to do things builds good self-esteem.  Children with good self-esteem learn to work things out on their own. The children then find themselves able and capable to complete tasks and want to do more.

Here is a list of things that really help:

Whatever you can do to support, love, and nurture your child, do it. If you find yourself hovering or even doing the project remove yourself and find someone who can help your child in a positive and nurturing manner.